The American Dream. A goal sought after by many but achieved by few. But why is that? Why do so many people give up on their dreams? Lately, I have put deep thought into the idea that too many people settle for lives they don’t want. When asked if they had a second chance at life, what they would do differently, they gave a laundry list of answers.
I get an empty feeling in my gut when I hear people rattle off all of the things they wish they did with their lives. The thought of having that sense of major regret terrifies me. Yet, I am so intrigued by these people and why they have just let their life be so ordinary. The life they once dreamed of just fell into the cracks and they watched it happen.
Hence the creation of this article. The hope and intention behind it’s design is that at least one person who needs to hear this will take action and not just settle for what’s in front of them. Instead, I want to challenge you to take the hard path and do something that may be galaxies outside your comfort zone but it gets you closer to your biggest aspirations.
How To Build Your Dream Life
Breaking down how to build your dream life into steps was daunting at first. There are so many necessary points involved, however they can be generally grouped into the following three:
- Dream it
- Build it
- Enjoy it
Corny, I know. But it gets better, trust me.
Dream It
What are your dreams, goals and aspirations? If you are coming up blank, then you need to put some serious time and energy into nailing these down. After all, what are you working towards every day if you don’t have even a single dream?
What do you really want to be doing? Do you wish your job was something completely different? Do you wish you were living on the other side of the planet?
Your dream could be to be happy, to be a television host or to be a real estate mogul.
My dream life consists of quite a few factors including emotional state, financial well-being and even location. It changes by my age and what I would like to be doing/where I would like to be living.
Regardless of what your dream is, you need to have one. And a word to the wise, don’t tie your dream to a material item (car, house, etc.). If you are talking about accumulating assets, that is one thing. However, tying your dream to a material item sets you up for always wanting more and never being satisfied (read this article on lifestyle inflation for more).
To dream it, what I like to do is to think about my life 40 years from now, then 30 years from now, then 20 years from now and so on. I break it down from the far future to think of what I need to be doing this year, this month and this day to reach the end goal.
Goals that make up your dream life can be a variety from achievable to almost unbelievable. You want some that will push you completely outside of your comfort zone and also some that are seemingly achievable.
For example, say that your goal is to have 100 properties by 40 and you are 30 years old. That means you have 10 years to reach it. Which means from 30 to 40, you need to acquire 10 properties a year. In one year, there are 12 months, to have 10 houses by year end you should be buying a new property every 5 weeks or so. And then to boil it down to single days, you need to be searching for deals and making an offer a week to meet your goal. **This is assuming that only 1 in every 5 offers you make on a property is accepted.**
I like to revisit this step often as goals can change very frequently. Nevertheless, at least in my experience, the values behind my goals stay the same – it is just the path that gets you there that changes.
Your end goal or dream life is going to be your daily motivation so make sure that it brings you a sense of elation. This is your spark, it what gets you started on your journey.
As one of my favorite quotes states, “motivation gets you started, but discipline makes you successful”. Don’t underestimate the power of discipline, especially when it comes to the next step.
Build It
Blood, sweat and tears. No, just joking… but only kind of.
In the “this article was inspired by” section of this post, you will see that some of the most successful people in the world all agreed that work ethic and the amount of hours you put into achieving goals is what separates those from achieving and those who just dream.
Are you ready to put in daily effort to making your dream come to fruition? Daily actions will add up, even the smallest of task completions or positive affirmations will help you in the long run.
I recently read Drive by Daniel H. Pink, and he made a great point that you should be striving every single day towards the person you want to become. His main example was to think of your idol and what they would do in all of the situations you deal with on a daily basis. The amount of extra effort it takes is normally minimal. The example he used was to go out of your way to hold the door for people when you normally wouldn’t. These little gestures add up and soon enough will become your norm.
I have been using this example on myself for trying to maintain a health diet and exercise routine. You may even hear me say out loud, “Gina, would Serena Williams skip the gym and eat marshmallows?”. Do I sound crazy? 100%. But does this help remind me of the importance of discipline and keep me on the right track? 10000%.
Anywho, that is just one tip that helps me as a daily reminder. The finance nerd in me, likes to think of this step from a business perspective. Picture yourself as a business and your dream life is where you want the business to end up. What would the business need every single day to get to the end goal?
A business would make sure that:
- They have a proper budget. Money would only be spent on items that will get the business closer to its end goal. The business would not be spending frivolously on items that wouldn’t help it succeed. Check out this article for my easy budget hack.
- They are investing their time wisely. Prioritizing goals and tasks that get them closer to their end goal (this means not watching hours of TV or scrolling through social media endlessly).
- They would be using their resources (time, money and energy) to educate themselves on how to reach their end goal (best paths, lessons from those who have already done it, strategies, etc.)
Do these make sense? I would even argue if you have a well-paying job, but it doesn’t get you closer to where you want to be that you should probably start looking for a new one. Your time is valuable. Put it (and your money & energy) only towards things that will help you.
Building your dream life is going to be hardest part of the process, but it will be so rewarding once you get there. Just be disciplined with yourself and don’t give up. That is your dream and don’t let anyone take it from you.
Enjoy It
Practice gratitude. You should of course, enjoy the journey towards the goal. But also make sure that you fully appreciate what you have accomplished once you accomplish it.
If you have reached a goal you have set or are living your dream life, then take time to be present and be proud of yourself.
You worked so hard to get there, you don’t want to just check the box and move onto the next big thing.
Relish in your accomplishment for a bit. Goals will always be able to be set, but enjoy what you have created for yourself.
Then once you are ready, rinse and repeat the above steps.
This article was inspired by:
- This article by CNBC, sent to me by my dear friend and fellow yellow (see color code personality test here), Jessi. My favorite analogy from this article is when Warren Buffet compares your life to a lottery ball, to give you perspective on how lucky you really are.
- While scrolling through instagram I passed by a meme that said “Does anyone else find themselves constantly checking their bank account to see how long they could last if they ran away to an island?”… While I laughed at first, this is an example of daydreaming an escape from your life instead of building a life you don’t need an escape from.
- I watched a compilation of interviews with those who are top of their industry (ex. The Rock, Gary Vaynerchuk, Elon Musk, etc.) and they all had one major thing in common. What was the key factor of their success? Work ethic. Each of them put endless hours of work into their dreams to make it reality. They didn’t just let their dreams be dreams. They worked for them day in and day out.
- How to Find and Do Work You Love – This TED talk by Scott Dinsmore is super eye opening. He has inspired so many people to not settle for complacency and find their passion.
Some Last Thoughts
Before wrapping up, I wanted to offer two more thoughts to you.
#1. Prior to writing this, I was hesitant to even do so because the thought of having any dream and trying to achieve it is incredibly Americanized, I know. There are many people in the world who in live countries that make this not possible for them. We are incredibly lucky to have the opportunities that we do and we are privileged to live somewhere where we can literally dream something up and try to achieve it.
This thought, although almost deterring me from writing the article, is the fire behind it. Since we have these opportunities in front of us, waiting to be taken advantage of, we need to capitalize on them. Realize that not everyone has this privilege and that you were lucky enough to be given it – use it wisely. And hey, if you can help those less fortunate than you along the way, then even better. đŸ™‚
#2. Do not beat yourself up for not achieving a goal in a specific time frame. Do not give yourself anxiety over something that will happen in time. As long as you are constantly striving towards your goals (& also enjoying life) things will pan out. Set realistic time goals to avoid this unnecessary extra stress.
Wrap Up
No, this process is not going to be easy but the steps are simple. Dream it, build it and enjoy it. Whether large goals or small goals, they all add up to building the life you want to live. What is stopping you from living your dream life? Don’t settle for a life you will regret.
What does your dream life look like? Did you do something today to get you closer to it? We want to know! Fill us in down below. đŸ™‚
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